Fantasy Humor Mystery holiday crime fiction Noir Santa Elves Dark humor

Holiday Noir

By Phillip T. Stephens
May 6, 2019 · 1,036 words · 4 minutes

Holiday noir

Story art by Phillip T. Stephens.  

From the author: Christmas morning. A crime scene in chaos. Tenace couldn’t imagine a worse way to end his year. A couch covered in children’s tears, the presents crushed into wrapping paper and Post-It notes and Santa on the carpet in front of the fireplace, face down with his skull broken open like a coconut.


Christmas morning. A crime scene in chaos. Tenace couldn’t imagine a worse way to end his year. A couch covered in children’s tears, the children stashed in a bedroom and bawling twice as loud, presents crushed into wrapping paper and Post-It notes. More fingerprint powder on the walls than paint.

And Santa on the carpet in front of the fireplace, face down with his skull broken open like a coconut. His hair redder than his velvet coat.

The real Santa. Holzkopf, his partner, ran the victim’...

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