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Rowling in the Year 3000

By KJ Kabza · Apr 21, 2019
1,086 words · 4-minute reading time


From the author: Long after her death, the estate of J.K. Rowling is a money-making machine, capitalizing on the creative output of dozens of her clones—just as all wealthy literary estates do in the year 3000. But J.K. Rowling clone Melanie refuses to let any other person (or entity) profit from her own creative spark. Can she refuse to write forever? Would giving in be so terrible? Or is there another way?


They don't allow me in the house. They're still sore with me over last year, when I snuck out and got a haircut in an unauthorized style. Well, what can I say; if I had to look into the mirror and see that predestined face one more time, I'd shatter it—the face or the mirror, I don't care which.

So instead of giving tours in the house, I stroll around the grounds in period clothing, so the tourists can take photos and draw me into false conversations about my life. This solution is exceptionally stupid. I am 28 years old, and she didn't even move into this house until her husband died, so how can I convincingly pretend to be her?

On rainy days, they shut me in an office without windows, in front of a notebook and a computer. They hope I will write something. And this, above all else, is the real reason why I hate them. Because I have ideas, so many delicious and vivid story ideas, but the other clones talk, and I know what would happen if I wrote anything down. They'd stamp ROWLING...

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KJ Kabza

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